Bookworm Cottage Style

After moving to the suburbs, I’ve been lucky enough to meet some nice gals with excellent friend potential. But crossing over from acquaintances to true, come-over-to-my-messy-house-in-your-pajamas friends takes a lot of exposures, which is tough when so many women in my life stage are juggling toddlers and newborns and careers and responsibilities. As I enter my own mom era, I want to make sure I’m building a network of local girlfriends who I can walk to the park or the local brewery with or invite on impromptu hangouts. Proximity is key!

Making new friends is hard. Reclaiming your social life after having kids (or any big life transition) is hard. Ultimately, I just kept reminding myself that people WANT to be invited to things. Did you read that Atlantic article about how Americans need to party more? The piece completely struck a chord with me, as it is something that I’ve been mulling over in my own life.  There is a loneliness epidemic, and sometimes you just need to take the reins and be the social director / party planner of your own life.

I saw Joanna Goddard post about attending a jewelry making party with her girlfriends and thought, this is exactly the vibe I want to cultivate! I want to be the type of person who has craft parties with her girlfriends, and the best way to make that happen is to host a craft night myself. And then I saw Julia Berolzheimer post about these bag charm kits she bought for her daughters and I knew I had identified my “activity.” 

So, I cleared a couple of dates by a neighborhood girlfriend, and then texted a Canva invite to a handful of other local moms in my neighborhood who I’ve met once or twice but wanted to get to know better. I landed on a Friday night at 8pm (after dinner & toddler bedtime routines). It feels really vulnerable to put yourself out there (what if everyone says no??) but each of the five ladies I invited sounded genuinely excited to be included.

Even though no one knew each other before the party, we all had something in common. Everyone (except me, ha!) was a toddler mom and half of us (including me) were in the 3rd trimester. Most importantly, everyone lived in either my neighborhood or one of our bordering neighborhoods. Since people didn’t know each other, I think having an “activity” helped break the ice a little. (That and everyone passing on their wisdom to me, the only first-time mom in the group.)

I’m human. Of course I wish I had a bigger kitchen table, and cuter table linens, and was a better baker, and had a cute new outfit to dress up my third trimester bump with. But oh well. Life is short. I pulled on my tried-and-true maternity jeans, shooed my husband out of the house for a few hours, and set out a few snacks and beverages. And you know what… we had a great time! Five out of five people ended up making it, and I didn’t even take any photos once people got there because everyone was too present to have their phones (plus, our hands were occupied).

Supplies:

• 1 x Bauble Bar Bag Charm Kit

Menu: 

• Smitten Kitchen Strawberry Cake
• Assorted beverages (Red wine + Spindrift Sparkling Water + Hop Waters)
• Other gals brought: Chocolate Chip Cookies, a Fruit Platter, and TJ’s Macarons

Looking to host your own craft night? In addition to the bag charms kit, some other ideas I brainstormed included making bookmarks, beaded jewelry making, something with decoupage, flower pressing, water coloring, or needlepoint/cross-stitch/embroidery. Years ago, a few friends and I also had a BYO craft night (someone brought watercolors, someone brought a coloring book, someone brought jewelry, etc.)

My heart is full and I hope to make some sort of local gals gathering a quarterly event. Perhaps bagels and iced coffee this summer at a local park with our new babes in tow?

Let this be your nudge to strike up a conversation with the regulars you see at barre class, to text that nice mom that you met but haven’t really hung out with, or to make plans with someone who fills your cup. And when in doubt, throw a party!